Me: What’s that mark on your arm? How did that happen?
Boy: Well we were playing foursquare with a basketball and …
Me: Nuh uh. Don’t give me that. A basketball DID NOT do that to your arm. What really happened?
Boy: (Looking at me for a few seconds) I got done with my math test before everyone else and I was sucking on my arm.
Me: (Poking my fingers in my eyes to relieve the pressure on my brain) OK.
Boy: It felt weird and left this weird mark.
Me: (Rolling my head around and listening to tension in my neck crack) Uh huh. Don’t suck on your arm. Or anything else like that. It’s not … it … just don’t.
Boy: OK. Can I play my game on your computer?
Me: (Leaving the room) Sure.
Boy: Where are you going?
Me: To lie down.
(Funny, I don’t remember this in those “What to expect” books.)