A moment in online dating

Men, listen up. When creating your online dating profile here are a few tips:

1. Don’t use a username like “skidrow” or “sancho.” Because that about sums it up.

2. Jewelry like a small cross seen in the photo is fine. Rethink the thick gold chain with the baseball-sized Dallas Cowboys pendant though.

3. Self portraits where you’re holding the camera low and looking down just lets us see up your nose and the ugly light fixture on your ceiling.

4. Put a shirt on and get out of your bathroom. Unless that’s how you spend a majority of your time, in which case … moving on.

5. I don’t want to see a photo of your car/jeep/truck/motorcycle. If that is how you define yourself, um … good luck.

That is all.

I’m getting offline and going to read a book. Fiction isn’t as scary.


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